Let’s be real here- we all have times when we are afraid, feel uncertain, and just want to stay within our comfort zone. People always tell me that they think I am confident in doing most things. Yeah…it’s somewhat true that I am confident when I do what I am good at and when I know the directions. It’s like we trust that the GPS will take us to wherever we put into the search bar, or you trust that your car won’t break down while driving on the freeway… when you know where you going, and you know how to get to that place. But life is not always like that, we have no control of what is going to happen tomorrow or even the next second. Something might happen after the second I finish typing up this sentence and after this period I put here.
While preparing myself for the new chapter of my life, I often become very timid, unsure of myself, and somewhat panicky. It’s like riding a roller coaster. There are unexpected ups and downs. I become so stressed and frustrated because I feel the loss of power and control of my life. I tried to rush through things and make sure to knock off tasks (wedding stuff) on the checklist ASAP… like A-S-A-P! But that does not make things easier and it certainly does not make me feel better. I bet we all have similar situations like this when you want to get things done quickly and in the right way. Of course, there is nothing wrong with that. Life is full of unexpected surprises- it doesn’t matter if you appreciate the surprises or not.
Then.. God speaks to me in many different ways: in songs, in sermons, or from the people around me. He reminds me of the importance of praying to him and that he has his plans for me and for the next chapters of my life because he is the writer. So…. I “chat” with him while on Bart – packed like sardines, while driving (especially in traffic), or when I cannot fall asleep. I tell him the worries that I have and the anxiety in me. After a while, it slowly becomes an unconscious habit, the checklist in my head does not seem to be that important anymore. I slowed down and let him take care of everything. Him- as in God and Jacky (lolz).
Here are a couple of scriptures that give me strengths and encouragements:
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5,6.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6,7.
We must realize- ONLY God is in control. No matter how hard we try to get ourselves to a destination, He is in control. Every day is a fresh new beginning, and we need Him to guide us through all the unknowns. When we surrender ourselves to God, sit in the passenger seat, and let him drive, we will be surprised by where he brings us.